November 18th, 2011 by Sophia Bendrodt

You know, because the only reason that women do their hair and makeup is to attract men.

Now, I’ve read plenty of stupid articles like this before and despite the long disclaimer (“Guys dont always agree on the looks they love and hate…Lets be honest, the average guy doesnt know a whole lot about womens hair and makeup trends…For the most part, guys love a normal, natural you…”), I’m still incredibly annoyed by it.

The sub-heading is particularly infuriating: “Trying to catch the guy at the bars eye? It wont happen if you look like this.”

Anyway, here’s the 12 looks that apparently women should avoid if they ever hope to snag a guy who responds to online polls:

1. A silvery, smoky eye

2. Bed head

3. A super dark and smoky eye

4. Wild curls

5. An edgy shag

6. Red lips

7. A ponytail

8. A bun

9. Bangs

10. Wearing a baseball hat (I love that they included this photo of Jessica Biel as if any guy would kick Jessica Biel out of their bed if she put a baseball hat on)

11. Dark red lips

12. A pixie cut

So in other words, guys don’t want girls to look too primped, too un-kept, too trendy or too matronly. Groundbreaking!

I know I don’t have a penis and all, but I happen to think that all of the above can be sexy/cute if done correctly. And I think the editors of TotalBeauty.com would probably agree even though they insist on posting articles like this that make women feel like shit. My advice to ladies out there: ignore this garbage and rock whatever hairstyle and makeup you so choose.

And guys, go fuck yourselves.

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